i cannot sleep and earl grey is not the reason tonight.

i ask myself why i am like this.

perhaps i'm still trying to piece my heart back together from an incident when it was smashed to smithereens. a process of construction. all the little bits and pieces balancing off each other, crumbling at times, struggling to find their way back into place.

and in the instances where i slip; when i knock them out of their settling and they crash once again to the floor in a mess. the fragments get smaller each time.

like a fucking puzzle i will never complete.